DRIVING

I wrote this a while back on a ranting section of a forum.. I figure I update it and post it here for you.

Like most everything else, people seem to forget basic driving rules and ettiquite.

1. Signal, look, change lanes. Do not omit, deviate or otherwise change the order of this process. Make sure you have ample clearance when doing so as well. Cutting people off on a regular basis is a one way ticket to getting rear ended.

As long as Im talking about signals, use them for turning, too. If you’re in a turning lane, I dont mind it much. If your making a left and im going straight, you better have a turn signal on, because Im going through you. Dont think I wont.. you have a nice car.. I has a POS.

2. If you speed, weave through traffic and otherwise drive with reckless abandon, expect dirty looks, the finger, potential ticket and potential loss of vehicle and/or life (we live in an age of road rage, folks.. dont encourage it). If you’re late for school or work, you’re late. Deal with it. Be responsible, get up on time, check a traffic report and leave accordingly.

If you are just itching to leapfrog from lane to lane to wind up a mere two car lengths ahead, you really aren’t getting there much faster.

3. PAY ATTENTION! If you are in a center lane and traffic is weaving and speeding around you. Its time to shift to the right lane (left in the UK?). You are blocking the flow of traffic. If you are from out of state or looking for an address people understand. Just move over. Thank you.

4. Backing up on the side of the highway to return to the exit ramp you missed marks you as dumb and dangerous. Expend the extra gas, go to the next exit and turn around.

And whatever you do.. Dont do this.. EVER.

5. This is big problem in the Atlanta Metro Area. Ive seen it in parts of NYC, too.. If there is a traffic jam, pile up or generally slow traffic, DO NOT DRIVE ON THE SHOULDER. Chances are you will have to merge back into the main road anyway. You will be blocking the most probable way official vehicles can get to the accident to clear it up. Unless you are under a mile from your exit, there is no reason to do this. Quite frankly I think its the rudest thing you can do.

You are also getting all sorts of glass, trash and unknown crap in your tires… good for you! I hope you get a couple of nails in there.

6. This one is a problem in DC/metro area, but I’ll pass it on since its a problem. I know people suck at driving. In MD people suck at parking, too. Can you people not get your vehicle in straight between two parallel lines? Is that so hard? Do I need to install those laser-rulers on the sides of my car to see if it will clear your car? Why are you diagonal over two parking spaces? THREE? Technically, these people arent breaking the law. They are just irritants. I have a can of primer in the back of my car and considering painting the line over the top of the vehicle to these offenders.

7. HANG UP THE CELL PHONE. This needs to be drilled into people.. Unless its a dire emergency, put down the phone. Theres a reason walkmen were outlawed while driving. It eliminates your ability to hear whats around you (I still see people with headphones on actually). Same basic concept.

Dont think texting is any safer.. its not. Remember that the next time you hear about some teenager getting into wreck while messaging someone. Fumbling around with your communicative dildo is a bad idea.

8. Dogs do not belong in your lap when you drive. Would you drive with a baby in your lap? Then why would you have your dog there? These people shouldn’t be allowed to drive period. Bad enough they are on the cell phone.